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"You can compare us at the moment to a bit of soft porn - there is an awful lot of foreplay and not a lot going on in the box."
Rochdale manager Keith Hill reflects on their 2-1 home defeat by Stockport.
"I got lucky because Ali missed a lot of balls - I'm playing rubbish in practice."
Ronnie O'Sullivan after hitting five straight centuries, including a maximum, against Ali Carter. You just let us know when you're playing well, Ron.
"It's been great so far, very positive and smooth apart from... the season."
David Beckham is having a ball in LA, aside from that pesky day job.
"Of course, Steven Gerrard is one of only a few Liverpool players who never get left out by Rafa. And even he doesn't always get picked."
David Pleat on Rafa's rotation policy during the Liverpool-Besiktas game.
"Last week, when Arsenal faced Slavia Prague, it was seven. For Liverpool tonight, it was eight. When Chelsea went to Schalke in Germany, it was NEIN."
Jim Rosenthal stakes his claim for corniest quote of the season on Champions League highlights.
"Liverpool have sent a message to the Liverpool's, the Chelsea's and the Arsenal's."
David Pleat after Liverpool scored eight against Besiktas. Exactly how do you send a message to yourself then, David?
"Are you Wigan in disguise?"
Bolton fans to Bayern Munich during the 2-2 draw.
"We've got more snow than you!"
Aberdeen fans to Lokomotiv Moscow on a snowy, wintry night at Pittodrie.
Rochdale manager Keith Hill reflects on their 2-1 home defeat by Stockport.
"I got lucky because Ali missed a lot of balls - I'm playing rubbish in practice."
Ronnie O'Sullivan after hitting five straight centuries, including a maximum, against Ali Carter. You just let us know when you're playing well, Ron.
"It's been great so far, very positive and smooth apart from... the season."
David Beckham is having a ball in LA, aside from that pesky day job.
"Of course, Steven Gerrard is one of only a few Liverpool players who never get left out by Rafa. And even he doesn't always get picked."
David Pleat on Rafa's rotation policy during the Liverpool-Besiktas game.
"Last week, when Arsenal faced Slavia Prague, it was seven. For Liverpool tonight, it was eight. When Chelsea went to Schalke in Germany, it was NEIN."
Jim Rosenthal stakes his claim for corniest quote of the season on Champions League highlights.
"Liverpool have sent a message to the Liverpool's, the Chelsea's and the Arsenal's."
David Pleat after Liverpool scored eight against Besiktas. Exactly how do you send a message to yourself then, David?
"Are you Wigan in disguise?"
Bolton fans to Bayern Munich during the 2-2 draw.
"We've got more snow than you!"
Aberdeen fans to Lokomotiv Moscow on a snowy, wintry night at Pittodrie.
That's something I'd expect Jeff Stelling to say.
Great quote there.