La Liga Jornada 13 + 15 (Xerez-Barcelona MIDWEEK!)

Marquez needs to go, fucking immediately and Chygrrrtritrttvvvfv have to learn the language, at least when the last stopper goes for a offside trap.
What's the Spanish for offside?

TITO wrote: What's the Spanish for offside?

I don't know but I believe its 'Van Nistelrooy' in Dutch.

How about Italian?

TheCrazy58 wrote:

TITO wrote: What's the Spanish for offside?

I don't know but I believe its 'Van Nistelrooy' in Dutch.

Inzaghi in Italy.

TheCrazy58 wrote:

Dualist wrote:

TheCrazy58 wrote:Jesus how did Iniesta miss that

Bojan had hit the bar just before Iniesta too

Bojan was substituted already.

I know, corrected I saw the whole thing on tv but from some distance and without my glasses on They do look quite similar from the back.

That's true. I'm also misled on who's who.

Dualist wrote:

TheCrazy58 wrote:

TITO wrote: What's the Spanish for offside?

I don't know but I believe its 'Van Nistelrooy' in Dutch.

Inzaghi in Italy.

'Henry' in French and 'Eto'o' in Cameroonian.

We can all agree 'Adebayor' is global 'un.

You mean for 'Colossal tosser'?

ronnies teeth wrote:Still hasn't had a cap i dont think. Never will either I reckon

Casillas, Reina, Diego Lopez (who are all 'Spanisher' as in not Catalan) and now younger keepers like Asenjo

I get the impression that Valdes isnt that fussed about the Spain team

What the hell are you talking about? Del Bosque has been sucking up to Barcelona so much since he took over that he even calls and plays Busquets regularly, who is as Catalan as it gets and is distinctively mediocre. Aragones had also travelled that road before by calling Bojan to the world cup which was a joke in itself.

Valdes has become decent lately but there are still much better goalies than him in Europe and in Spain. Why call Valdes when he is clearly worse than Casillas, Reina, and Diego Lopez?

I also think people here are overrating his saves. The saves against Drogba and Ronaldo were good but not great given that they were shots directly at him, and I don't remember him doing anything special in either CL final. Truth is that Valdes benefits from having an excellent defense in front of him and where he doesn't have to do too much. But let's not forget moments like his "assist" to De la Peña last year which still do happen, though admittedly less frequently.

Torrente wrote:

ronnies teeth wrote:Still hasn't had a cap i dont think. Never will either I reckon

Casillas, Reina, Diego Lopez (who are all 'Spanisher' as in not Catalan) and now younger keepers like Asenjo

I get the impression that Valdes isnt that fussed about the Spain team

What the hell are you talking about? Del Bosque has been sucking up to Barcelona so much since he took over that he even calls and plays Busquets regularly, who is as Catalan as it gets and is distinctively mediocre. Aragones had also travelled that road before by calling Bojan to the world cup which was a joke in itself.

Valdes has become decent lately but there are still much better goalies than him in Europe and in Spain. Why call Valdes when he is clearly worse than Casillas, Reina, and Diego Lopez?

I also think people here are overrating his saves. The saves against Drogba and Ronaldo were good but not great given that they were shots directly at him, and I don't remember him doing anything special in either CL final. Truth is that Valdes benefits from having an excellent defense in front of him and where he doesn't have to do too much. But let's not forget moments like his "assist" to De la Peña last year which still do happen, though admittedly less frequently.

read all that you just wrote and tell me that you meant that, it like someone said Iker makes a save and its the greatest thing in the world, valdes does the exact same thing and its the striker that misses.

Barca have a poor defense, its because of barca's defense way he looks so good. The irony

Liverpool have a poor defense, but its because of Reina way they look so good.

Shall we compare all of Iker's and Reina Del la pena like moments throughout their careers.

stop talking bull and just look at things honestly, the only spanish keep who is better than VV is Iker and thats it.

What are you smoking? Where did I ever write this:

Liverpool have a poor defense, but its because of Reina way they look so good

Barca have a poor defense, its because of barca's defense way he looks so good. The irony

I'm not even sure if this last comment above is English.

Shall we compare all of Iker's and Reina Del la pena like moments throughout their careers

If we were to compare them to the ones Valdes has made, we would be here until next week listing them all.

stop talking bull and just look at things honestly, the only spanish keep who is better than VV is Iker and thats it.

Yes, let's look at things honestly. The truth is that if Valdes wasn't Catalan Barcelona would have found a replacement a long time ago. He's improved recently, but he's certainly not a world class goalie and still not good enough for the Spanish team. Spain has continuously had better goalies than him, whether it was Cañizares, Palop, Reina, Lopez, etc.

Sure, Valdes would make the starting lineup in other national teams such as England, but this "victim" approach that Barcelona fans have toward Valdes is laughable. He's not in the Spanish team because he isn't good enough. PERIOD.

If Valdes is discriminated against because he is catalan how the hell do Xavi, Puyol, and Pique get into the national team? Valdes has improved a lot but it's not been that long ago that the majority of Barcelona supporters on this forum were wanting to replace him. Spain has great depth in goalkeepers and like Torrente says, at the moment he is just not good enough to be in the top three. I'd say there are currently 6 spanish goalkeepers at least as good or better than Valdes.

I just think that he has been completely ignored for so long (not even 2nd, 3rd keeper) that he has assumed that he is not ever playing for Spain. And therefore doesn't care much anymore

That is all

The Breast-Feeding Weekend Predictions - Round 13

Saturday

Sevilla (3rd) vs Valladolid (15th)

The next round of the comedy Copa del Rey was drawn this week, and it was a round that was totally free and open this time, apparently.

Free and open in the ‘higher ranked sides at the time of the draw get to play their first leg games away from home’ sense, that is.

After all, who wants pikey riffraff like Getafe getting through to the final again?

The most intriguing of the eight ties is Sevilla’s clash with Barcelona, and it produced sneakily-recorded footage of Freddie Kanouté on the phone to Carles Puyol - or having a bit of a jape, perhaps - and telling him that he will be done like a Catalan kipper when the two sides meet in January.

Poor old Alcorcón were hoping for either of the aforementioned Big Boys as reward for their rogering of Real Madrid, but have been handed run-of-the-mill Racing Santander instead.

“It’s a long coach trip,” was the bleak message from the crestfallen players to AS when the draw was announced.

Still, they displayed more knowledge about their opponents than Alcorcón president Esteban Márquez, who admitted that “I don’t know anything about Racing. The truth is I don’t really understand football.”

So, there you go. A club run by a president who knows naff all about what he is supposedly in charge of.

Maybe Real Madrid and Alcorcón have more in common after all?

LLL Prediction - Home win

Xerez (20th) v Atlético Madrid (17th)

Recently, a letter was poked into La Liga Loca’s pigeonhole demanding payment for a brand new “refuse collection tax” that looked suspiciously like a sly, sneaky way of raising funds to pay for Madrid’s ludicrous Olympic bid and the billions lost by local politicians in corruption.

So, like much of the rest of the city’s population, the blog gave the letter the finger and went about its business.

But that was until an even angrier, legal-sounding missive arrived soon after like a Harry Potter Howler, all to chase a debt worth about €24.

And this led La Liga Loca to pondering over a pomegranate tea HOW IN ALL THAT IS FRACKIN’ HOLY Atlético Madrid have racked up a €200 million debt to the taxman without anyone apparently doing a FRACKIN’ THING about it!

That’s not even mentioning the club’s refusal to sell Kun Agüero - something that could fill a few potholes, no doubt.

And the blog definitely isn’t going into the other financial revelation made by the club this week that Gil-spawn, Miguel Angel, takes a near million euro salary for his role as Delegate General while schools go unheated, orphans go hungry and La Liga Loca gets inane letters from a busted *rse, morally and financially bankrupt city council.

LLL Prediction - Home win (more in hope, than reality)

Real Madrid (2nd) v Almería (13th)

Some poor hack at Marca probably spent his childhood dreaming of a journalistic life spent uncovering corruption and capturing evil doers.

Writing about the launch of a new line of Real Madrid underwear and describing it as “the first time this has happened in history,” probably featured little.

Unsurprisingly, the chance to gaze at pretty ladies in their smalls has led to massive coverage pretty much across the board in Spain, with even Pepe grinning that “the girls who came out were pretty hot.”

Most importantly of all, the story has given more gags to La Liga Loca than it knows what to do with.

(Starts comedy music on CD player) Madridistas will be able to get their hands on some ‘Pepe pants’ - guaranteed to drop to the ground at the slightest of touches, or the Marcelo cheek-free boxers - undies that offer no support at the back whatsoever.

And then there’s the top-selling Guti knickers - beneath the thinnest of layers you come across the biggest of c...(ENOUGH! FFT Editor)

LLL Prediction - Home win

Deportivo (5th) vs Barcelona (1st)

Although the Madridista press made a fine attempt at getting over the 1-0 defeat at the Camp Nou by pretending that Real actually won the Catalan encounter, there was still a tinge of sadness lying just beneath the bold bravado.

But that glimmer of gloom was soon wiped out by some tremendous photos that were published portraying the King of Catalunya, Joan Laporta, dancing like a diva in a fancy disco to celebrate Sunday’s victory of the forces of all that is good in the world over the Castle Greyskull outfit.

However, the Barcelona president is not looking his brilliant best being somewhat sweaty and having been soaked to the skin in booze.

Whilst this was material enough for a potential peetake in the Spanish capital, what really got Madridista juices flowing was the sight of a limbo-dancing Laporta with a bottle of €100 French champagne in hand.

And not a bottle of famous Catalan Cava.

“I’d have had Cava with me,” snooted Juame Guixà, a gentleman who has just announced his intentions to run in next year’s Barça presidential elections.

Now, Laporta could have had a good-natured chuckle at the incident and moved on.

Instead, being as paranoid and humourless as they come, Joan trotted out the familiar line of “the Spanish media cavern trying to destabilise Barcelona and...and...”

LLL Prediction - Draw

Sunday

Tenerife (16th) vs Sporting (7th)

Only one thing could knock Mrs Tiger Woods off the news charts in Sweden this week.

And that’s a breast-feeding man, so says thelocal.se

“Ragnar Bengtsson, 26, has failed in his high profile bid to pump forth milk from his breasts.

"But there is some consolation for the self-styled "Milkman," who is winging his way to the United States this week for an appearance on The Tyra Banks Show.

"Bengtsson's milk race began with a bang in early September as he set about pumping his breasts on a three-hourly basis.

"The unorthodox sight of a young dad with a machine pressed to his nipples became part of daily life at Stockholm University, as the economics student endeavoured to do his bit for gender equality.

"But ultimately, the experiment failed, with Bengtsson unable to live up to the name of his blog: 'The Milkman - One Drop at a Time'.

"On Tuesday at 9pm, he returns to the TV8 studio and the Aschberg show where it all began for a final look back at a trial considered intriguing and brave by some, but sickening and unnatural by many others.”

LLL Prediction - Home win

Espanyol (11th) vs Racing Santander (19th)

Being the president of Cantabria simply isn’t thrilling enough to keep the easily bored Miguel Angel Revilla happy, it seems.

Earlier this season, the cow-loving crazy picked a fight with Joan Laporta - a very easy thing to do - and he is at it again by slamming local football side Racing for their summer signings.

“Who are the morons who made them?” asked Revilla during the week.

Defender, Pablo Pinillos, responded by pointing out that “declarations like this don’t help solve our problems.”

LLL Predictions - Home win

Mallorca (6th) vs Zaragoza (14th)

There’s been yet more skullduggery in the Balearic badlands this week, with the club’s accounts being leaked to Marca - a paper that was more than pleased to publish them.

And they revealed that Mallorca manager Gregorio Manzano is being paid €1.8 million a year with his number two getting a hefty €295,000.

Considering that both are keeping Mallorca near the top of the table despite the side’s best players being sold every summer and much of the squad lucky to get their monthly wage, La Liga Loca feels that Manzano is worth every cent.

However, this has not stopped some criticism from those who feel that these salaries are flights of fancy for a club some €40 million in debt and desperately struggling to make ends meet.

LLL Prediction - Home win

Málaga (18th) vs Osasuna (10th)

By scheduling this particular encounter at 5pm rather than the more telegenic 9pm, la Liga’s big cheeses are missing a trick as it is going to be a humdinger of hubris, a virtuoso display of vengeful violence.

The combination of Osasuna being Osasuna - brilliantly filthy - and a Málaga smashing their way out of trouble at the bottom of the table means that it will be card-city down south on Sunday afternoon.

LLL Prediction - Home win (six off)

Villarreal (12th) vs Getafe (9th)

Having grown tired of booing manager’s son Adrían, the dwindling Coliseum crowd following Getafe have now taken to giving star summer signing Danny Parejo the same treatment.

This has not made Getafe president Angel Torres a happy bunny at all considering the side is having one of its best starts to the season in the top flight.

“You don’t have the right to do everything you want,” claimed a growling Torres who attacked fans and warned that they “can’t boo a player from the first minute of a game.”

Unless it is Roberto Soldado, perhaps.

LLL Prediction - Home win

Athletic Bilbao (8th) vs Valencia (4th)

Despite the Spanish enjoying nothing more than making fun of hapless Atlético Madrid, there was some sympathy for the Calderón club when it had to play a Champions League match against PSV behind closed doors last season, due to crowd control issues during the group opener against Marseille.

Since that point, UEFA - and especially Michel Platini - have been largely viewed as ham-hating froggies hell-bent on ruining the game in Spain.

So, it is no surprise that Marca have called for the strongest of sanctions against Austria Vienna after a group of Ultras invaded the pitch 20 minutes into the second half of Thursday’s Europa Cup clash with the visitors 2-0 up.

“They interrupted the match with numerous flares and soon after, they invaded the pitch,” writes Santiago Segurola on trouble which Marca claims came about through a number of hooligans from clubs such as Stuttgart and Lazio ganging together against Athletic by producing pre-constitution Spanish flags and waving banners with messages such as ‘Viva Franco’.

After a 25 minute delay, the game continued with Athletic eventually running out 3-0 winners and qualifying for the next round of the competition.

But Marca remain unmoved by the positive end to the affair.

“According to their own doctrine, just one of the many flares or fascist banners that were on display constituted enough motive to have suspended the game,” said Friday’s editorial which calls for an explanation into why the show went on in the Austrian capital.

LLL Predictions - Away win

Ramos!

Come on Madrid.

vdVaart has been great so far.

Since 1888 wrote:vdVaart has been great so far.

Yea he's been decent.

Laudable Laudrup wrote:Ramos!

Come on Madrid.

It's been a while since Ramos has scored.

the lack of movement and imagination is serioulsy fustrating.

dear oh dear.

I'm one of the few Madrid fans who likes Marcelo and VV.

this is what we get for bieng complecent.

fucking hell..

2-1 Almeria now Fukkk

some awful play from a lot of our players

Nothing annoys me more than when Pepe starts to make those long passes.


Higuain!!!! Who been shit before this.

Pipita!!!!!!!!!!

Quite a lucky goal really.

why is Granero taking those stupid long shots at goal.

I think Pepe is starting to believe these long ass passes are effective.

Penalty!