Monday’s Good Day, Bad Day - Round 11
Monday 17 November 2008 12:00
Good Day
Sporting
La Liga Loca spent Saturday night injecting bleach into its eyeballs in a desperate attempt to banish the images of the Valladolid vs Real Madrid match from its brain, so missed out on this corker at the Mestalla.
Sporting’s swashbuckling football stylings have now seen the side win five of the six games played since being put through the football wringer at the start of the season.
Whilst Preciado’s players may find it hard to keep up their momentum, they look good for another season in the top flight. And as the club possesses one of the few sets of support that actually travels to games, that would be a very good thing.
On a similar note, there were only 100 odd Sevilla fans in Getafe on Sunday. A city with five million or so people can surely offer up more exiled supporters than that rather paltry, but noisy, number?
Valladolid
With the 19-year old goalkeeper, Sergio Asenjo in the starting line up, the average age of the Valladolid 11 was just under 30. Without him, it would have been 67. Still young enough to beat Real Madrid though.
Barcelona
A double day of delight for the Dream Boys. Not only did they slip past a Recreativo side that Guardiola feared would be hard to break down, but all of Pep’s rivals dropped points too.
Fernando Llorente
When La Liga Loca heard that Llorente had been called up to the Spain squad, the blog nodded in approval. Del Bosque had picked a striker that had been superb for Valladolid last season and was performing pluckily for Villarreal both in Spain and Europe, this time round.
But - and not for the first time - the simple-minded La Liga Loca had confused Joseba with Fernando. But maybe the Spain manager had too?
Vicente del Bosque has chosen the gangly ‘new Arizmendi’ striker busy entertaining all in San Mamés. Still, the floppy-haired forward popped up with a peach on Sunday to lead Athletic to their first win in seven.
Numancia
Maybe La Liga Loca was a little hasty in writing off Numancia’s survival chances after coming back from 3-2 down to win 4-3 on Sunday. So let’s check who they were playing... Oh. Still going down!
Alvaro Negredo
Surely a better choice at the Bernabeu than Crespo? Or would that mean admitting another wrong move by Madrid by letting the Almería striker go in the first place?
Atlético Madrid
No matter what poor old Javier Aguirre does, the Mexican manager is derided and damned in the Spanish press.
First he was criticised for overplaying Kun Agüero, and then for resting him. And it has been a similar situation with Diego Forlán - another player who simply doesn’t have a 50-match season in his legs.
So, it is with a tremendous but inevitable air of ‘told-you-so’ self satisfaction that Monday’s papers are full of praise for the 4-1 win over a dreadful Deportivo which saw Kun and Diego starting together.
Sevilla
After seeing them in full Technicolor for the second time this season, La Liga Loca still isn’t enjoying Sevilla v2.
The side swapped flair for physical power over the summer, something that Javier Casquero agreed with in a wee chat with the blog after the game.
“They lost important players in midfield along with Dani Alves. These are players who made a big difference. Now, they play very high up the field and are very competitive,” said the Getafe midfielder.
Sergio Garcia
It was the only other day that La Liga Loca remembered that the Euro 2008 winner had moved to Betis from Zaragoza over the summer.
And that may be the same situation for the fans, after the midfielder/striker thingy woke up and scored a brace in a match where both teams wore green for some reason.
Bad Day
Bernd Schuster
Monday’s events at the Bernabeu may overtake the current ramblings of the blog, but it seems that Schuster’s goose is gandered.
Both Marca and AS are citing the German’s failure to lead Sunday’s voluntary training session as evidence of his lack of concern at the his side’s current sickly state.
The fact that he was attending his baby daughter’s baptism has been overlooked somewhat.
Raúl
Another fine performance for Madrid’s sporting director. Bugger all for 90-minutes aside from a feeble late miss in a one-on-one against Asenjo.
La Liga Loca
The blog travelled all the way to Getafe and not one sniff - in the metaphorical sense - of the mythical Granero’s Bird.
Maybe Esteban’s angel went into hiding after watching her fella’s dreadful attempt at a penalty?
Espanyol
Judging by the weekend’s comments controversy on the blog, Paul from Barcelona’s crankiness was not helped one little bit by watching Espanyol go down 3-4 to Numancia. Brace! Brace! Brace!
“A big welcome today to over 200 vocal Numancia fans who had made the journey. And some journey it is too.
Steve Finnan started at right back for Espanyol. We hoped he wouldn't get confused as he was playing against a team in all red and that contained 11 Spanish players.
Numancia took the lead when a long shot from the number 6 (it's Numancia, you tell me their names then?) went in after good work on the left wing.
Espanyol equalised from a corner that found Moises, back to goal, who then in a kind of overhead kick, shot into the goal. An excellent finish.
1-1 at half time, about right and no warning of what was to come.
1-2: a break down the left and a stooping glancing header put Numancia ahead
2-2: Jarque's header hit the ground, the bar and defender before going in.
3-2: Tamudo brought down in the area. Penalty. Which he took himself despite his recent record and buried it bottom corner.
3-3: A great curling shot into the top right-hand corner.
3-4: With Espanyol pushing forward. Numancia raced away down the left and the guy hammered it from the edge of the area into the far corner. A worthy match winner.
So three points for an effective Numancia team who took their chances well and got a round of applause from the home fans. Well, we all secretly like Numancia don't we ?
For Espanyol it was pretty poor. Finnan looked off the pace, but then he's been injured. Some of our players are just not good enough. Simple as that.
Stray cat count... 0 (I'm getting worried)"
Paul, Barcelona
Valencia
Two home defeats in a row in the league! Emery out!
“Something isn’t working,” mused Unai after the 3-2 defeat to Sporting.
Osasuna
Without a league goal in four matches. And only one scored in nine. Now La Liga Loca is no expert, but that doesn’t sound very good.
Villarreal
Still the only unbeaten side in the Primera but will be smarting after a losing the lead in injury time against Málaga - on a pitch that Manuel Pellegrini was not at all happy about.
“In my opinion you shouldn’t have to play on pitches in this state,” complained the Villarreal bigwig.
“And Rubinos (the referee) was under pressure. He gave a lot of fouls against us and in one of them they scored,” continued Pellegrini using the trusted ‘Fergie defence.’
Calidad wrote:Fabiano won't leave Sevilla for a UEFA Cup side.
He may be a donkey, but he's not an ass.
White Stripes and Wrong Stripes in La Liga
Tuesday 18 November 2008 10:00
When a team’s square-jawed, super-duper, fans’ favourite forward ends up with a knee knack or a gammy groin, there are several ways for a club to deal with the unfortunate occurrence.
The most popular approach is to give the sickly striker the finest treatment money can buy, feed them the fluffiest of muffins and tuck them into bed with a story every night.
Some - like one particular club that plays in white - prefer to turn on each other in a Lord of the Flies, zombie massacre.
But Betis, for one, like to do things a little differently.
A couple of weeks ago, majority shareholder Darth de Lopera - the King of Stinge, the Mr Burns of Betis - was gazing at his video wall and discovered, with a start, that all was not well with one of his slaves.
“Minion! Who is this... Edu? And why is he limping!” demanded Darth de Lopera.
“He’s our top striker, sir. The one who saved us from relegation last season,” simpered the fawning lackey. “He’s about to go to Finland for an operation to get his leg fixed. He should be back with us in the New Year.”
“What! An operation!” screamed the tight-fisted titan, sending his yapping Huskies into a panic. “Do you know how expensive they are! This won’t do! This won’t do at all!”
And so it came to pass that Edu travelled to the Finnish town of Turku to have his leg knack taken care of. And had to pay for the travel, accommodation and procedure out of his own pocket.
I wasn’t expecting anything else from de Lopera,” sighed the significantly skinter striker from the comfort of his local Lapp dancingclub.
Edu’s cause was probably hindered a little by his current contract extension wrangle with Betis - a club who have told him he can sling his hook in the winter window.
Possibly to a side whose gym equipment is not 10 years old and where the players did not have to pay for the dressing room heaters themselves.
And it’s with barmy Betis where the blog stays for the next of today’s pickings from the Primera.
La Liga Loca was more than a little perplexed - but not surprised - to tune in for a bit of Sunday’s Betis vs Racing clash, only to see two teams wearing green and white shirts on the pitch.
It seems that this confusing clash of colours started shortly before kick-off when, referee, Ayza Gámez called over Racing boss, Juan Ramón López Muñiz.
Ayza: “Oi! Juan! Your team are in green. You’re going to have to change. Betis play in green and white stripes.”
Juan: “But its our second kit! We cleared this with the Federation before the game.”
Ayza: “I don’t care. You’re in green. Betis are in green. The grass is green.”
Juan: “Hang on, I’ll get Toni the kit man. Oi! Toni! Come here! We’ve got a problem. We can’t play in our second shirts as they’re green. Have we got our white first team kit with us?”
Toni: “No. But we’ve got our third-choice shirts.”
Juan: “Excellent. What colour are they?”
Toni: “Green.”
Juan: “OK. What about the ones we’re using in Europe?”
Toni: “The red ones?”
Juan: “Yes!”
Toni: “They’re back in Santander.”
Ayza: “Hang on a minute. I’ll get the Betis kit man over. Oi! Pepe!”
Pepe: “What’s up?”
Ayza: “We’ve got a problem. Betis play in green. Racing’s two kits are green. What about using Betis’ second kit?”
Pepe: “Good plan.”
Ayza: “What colour is it?”
Pepe: “Green.”
Ayza: “****. What about their third kit?”
Pepe: “White... and green.”
Ayza: “So. Betis’ first strip is green and white stripes. The second kit is green. And the third kit is green and white stripes?”
Pepe: “Yes. But the stripes are horizontal.”
And so it came to pass that the Betis shop was raided and the two teams played in green and white striped shirts, with Betis’ tops going vertically and Racing’s stripes going horizontally, with a sticker that only partially covered the Betis badge.
And it’s Tuesday’s Marca which brings us the perfect ending to this tall tale.
When the Racing players asked if they could keep the shirts as a souvenir of the day, Betis said no problem. As long as they paid for them.
kas wrote:
White Stripes and Wrong Stripes in La Liga
Tuesday 18 November 2008 10:00
When a team’s square-jawed, super-duper, fans’ favourite forward ends up with a knee knack or a gammy groin, there are several ways for a club to deal with the unfortunate occurrence.
The most popular approach is to give the sickly striker the finest treatment money can buy, feed them the fluffiest of muffins and tuck them into bed with a story every night.
Some - like one particular club that plays in white - prefer to turn on each other in a Lord of the Flies, zombie massacre.
But Betis, for one, like to do things a little differently.
A couple of weeks ago, majority shareholder Darth de Lopera - the King of Stinge, the Mr Burns of Betis - was gazing at his video wall and discovered, with a start, that all was not well with one of his slaves.
“Minion! Who is this... Edu? And why is he limping!” demanded Darth de Lopera.
“He’s our top striker, sir. The one who saved us from relegation last season,” simpered the fawning lackey. “He’s about to go to Finland for an operation to get his leg fixed. He should be back with us in the New Year.”
“What! An operation!” screamed the tight-fisted titan, sending his yapping Huskies into a panic. “Do you know how expensive they are! This won’t do! This won’t do at all!”
And so it came to pass that Edu travelled to the Finnish town of Turku to have his leg knack taken care of. And had to pay for the travel, accommodation and procedure out of his own pocket.
I wasn’t expecting anything else from de Lopera,” sighed the significantly skinter striker from the comfort of his local Lapp dancing
Edu’s cause was probably hindered a little by his current contract extension wrangle with Betis - a club who have told him he can sling his hook in the winter window.
Possibly to a side whose gym equipment is not 10 years old and where the players did not have to pay for the dressing room heaters themselves.
And it’s with barmy Betis where the blog stays for the next of today’s pickings from the Primera.
La Liga Loca was more than a little perplexed - but not surprised - to tune in for a bit of Sunday’s Betis vs Racing clash, only to see two teams wearing green and white shirts on the pitch.
It seems that this confusing clash of colours started shortly before kick-off when, referee, Ayza Gámez called over Racing boss, Juan Ramón López Muñiz.
Ayza: “Oi! Juan! Your team are in green. You’re going to have to change. Betis play in green and white stripes.”
Juan: “But its our second kit! We cleared this with the Federation before the game.”
Ayza: “I don’t care. You’re in green. Betis are in green. The grass is green.”
Juan: “Hang on, I’ll get Toni the kit man. Oi! Toni! Come here! We’ve got a problem. We can’t play in our second shirts as they’re green. Have we got our white first team kit with us?”
Toni: “No. But we’ve got our third-choice shirts.”
Juan: “Excellent. What colour are they?”
Toni: “Green.”
Juan: “OK. What about the ones we’re using in Europe?”
Toni: “The red ones?”
Juan: “Yes!”
Toni: “They’re back in Santander.”
Ayza: “Hang on a minute. I’ll get the Betis kit man over. Oi! Pepe!”
Pepe: “What’s up?”
Ayza: “We’ve got a problem. Betis play in green. Racing’s two kits are green. What about using Betis’ second kit?”
Pepe: “Good plan.”
Ayza: “What colour is it?”
Pepe: “Green.”
Ayza: “****. What about their third kit?”
Pepe: “White... and green.”
Ayza: “So. Betis’ first strip is green and white stripes. The second kit is green. And the third kit is green and white stripes?”
Pepe: “Yes. But the stripes are horizontal.”
And so it came to pass that the Betis shop was raided and the two teams played in green and white striped shirts, with Betis’ tops going vertically and Racing’s stripes going horizontally, with a sticker that only partially covered the Betis badge.
And it’s Tuesday’s Marca which brings us the perfect ending to this tall tale.
When the Racing players asked if they could keep the shirts as a souvenir of the day, Betis said no problem. As long as they paid for them.
Told you, that kit clashing thing is classic La Liga
Who wants to be a Mestalla millionaire?
Wednesday 19 November 2008 10:00
Are you tired of working for The Spanish Man?
Have you been worn down by the daily grind of getting up at 10am, having breakfast, the second breakfast, the four-hour meeting, the long boozy lunch and the journey home at 5pm?
Then prepare to give your troubles the footballing finger with La Liga Loca’s simple, Guti-proof, four-stage, qet-rich-quick scheme that simply cannot fail.
1) Keep a beady eye in the ‘Opportunities’ section of Valencia’s website.
2) Apply for any open positions with the words ‘sporting’, ‘technical’, or ‘director’ in the title.
3) Pass interview.
4) Get sacked after three months.
This has been the route taken by many newly-minted former Mestalla men - all of whom can testify that this is a ruse that will make you rich, rich, rich!
“I did two weeks work and got 10 million euro! (according to El Pais)” gushed ex-president-type-thing, Juan Villalonga. “And all thanks to the blog’s Mestalla Money Machine!”
“Me?! I got sacked when we were near the top of the table and pocketed three million! Thanks La Liga Loca,” beams former manager, Quique Sánchez Flores.
This may sound too good to be true, but this information comes from a source as honest and trustworthy as a Primera president... Valencia’s accounts.
Current Mestalla bigwig, Vicente Soriano has revealed that over the last accounting year, the club forked out 16 million euro in severance payments, including the aforementioned 3 million to Quique and 2.2 million to get rid of Santiago Cañizares.
But what isn’t made clear is whether those payments included the cash owed to Ronald Koeman and his technical team after their dismissal last season. Or the posse that followed him. Or Villalonga, for his all-too-brief stay as the club’s President-Idol 2008 winner.
Either way, Soriano is claiming that a 140 million euro profit was made during the last financial year and that “an agreement exists to sell the Mestalla land for 300 million euros,” which would bring the club’s debt down to an infinitely more manageable 400-odd million euro.
But because those in Valencia think that 'transparency' is the left-back for Udinese
There is secrecy and skulduggery afoot in Sevilla with the news that the law firm offices of, club president, José Maria del Nido have been burgled and that two of his personal laptops were stolen.
Del Nido’s current high profile case is the defence of, former Marbella mayor, Julian Muñoz who is in the slammer having been accused of massive corruption during his time in his institutional role.
Fortunately for Muñoz, Del Nido has experience with dealing with lower life forms as the Sevilla big cheese also served as Jesus Gil’s lawyer.
And finally, La Liga Loca has had to make a rapid adjustment to the Sack Race chart.
Rumbles in the Barcelona press suggest that the neck of, Espanyol manager, Bartolomé ‘Tintin’ Márquez will be next on the managerial block of doom.
And that would be a great shame, considering La Liga Loca has just gone to the extensive trouble of learning his name, with the blog having been convinced the boldy boss would be sacked in September.
A rather poorly attended Perico poll in Mundo Deportivo suggests that 56 percent of those bothering to vote - which includes the blog - thinks that Tintin should be shown the door.
But this should be taken with a pinch of salt, considering 4 percent of one poll tips Spurs to win the Premier League while another asks the Culé collective what they most love about Pep’s Dream Boys.
From the eight options offered up, it’s ‘the motivation’ that is currently winning out.
La Liga Loca’s completely made up and not to be taken seriously with real money Sack Race
6-1 Bartolomé Márquez (Espanyol)
7-1 Bernd Schuster (Real Madrid)
11-1 Bernd Schuster’s replacement (Real Madrid)
14-1 Javier Aguirre (Atlético)
15-1 Victor Muñoz (Getafe)
16-1 Unai Emery (Valencia)
Great stuffDe Guzman wrote:11-1 Bernd Schuster’s replacement (Real Madrid)
Who wants to be a Mestalla millionaire?
Wednesday 19 November 2008 10:00
Are you tired of working for The Spanish Man?
Have you been worn down by the daily grind of getting up at 10am, having breakfast, the second breakfast, the four-hour meeting, the long boozy lunch and the journey home at 5pm?
Then prepare to give your troubles the footballing finger with La Liga Loca’s simple, Guti-proof, four-stage, qet-rich-quick scheme that simply cannot fail.
1) Keep a beady eye in the ‘Opportunities’ section of Valencia’s website.
2) Apply for any open positions with the words ‘sporting’, ‘technical’, or ‘director’ in the title.
3) Pass interview.
4) Get sacked after three months.
This has been the route taken by many newly-minted former Mestalla men - all of whom can testify that this is a ruse that will make you rich, rich, rich!
“I did two weeks work and got 10 million euro! (according to El Pais)” gushed ex-president-type-thing, Juan Villalonga. “And all thanks to the blog’s Mestalla Money Machine!”
“Me?! I got sacked when we were near the top of the table and pocketed three million! Thanks La Liga Loca,” beams former manager, Quique Sánchez Flores.
This may sound too good to be true, but this information comes from a source as honest and trustworthy as a Primera president... Valencia’s accounts.
Current Mestalla bigwig, Vicente Soriano has revealed that over the last accounting year, the club forked out 16 million euro in severance payments, including the aforementioned 3 million to Quique and 2.2 million to get rid of Santiago Cañizares.
But what isn’t made clear is whether those payments included the cash owed to Ronald Koeman and his technical team after their dismissal last season. Or the posse that followed him. Or Villalonga, for his all-too-brief stay as the club’s President-Idol 2008 winner.
"3 million euro... but we don't want to give you that!"
Either way, Soriano is claiming that a 140 million euro profit was made during the last financial year and that “an agreement exists to sell the Mestalla land for 300 million euros,” which would bring the club’s debt down to an infinitely more manageable 400-odd million euro.
But because those in Valencia think that 'transparency' is the left-back for Udinese, Soriano will not be revealing the names of these mysterious buyers.
There is secrecy and skulduggery afoot in Sevilla with the news that the law firm offices of, club president, José Maria del Nido have been burgled and that two of his personal laptops were stolen.
Del Nido’s current high profile case is the defence of, former Marbella mayor, Julian Muñoz who is in the slammer having been accused of massive corruption during his time in his institutional role.
Fortunately for Muñoz, Del Nido has experience with dealing with lower life forms as the Sevilla big cheese also served as Jesus Gil’s lawyer.
And finally, La Liga Loca has had to make a rapid adjustment to the Sack Race chart.
Rumbles in the Barcelona press suggest that the neck of, Espanyol manager, Bartolomé ‘Tintin’ Márquez will be next on the managerial block of doom.
And that would be a great shame, considering La Liga Loca has just gone to the extensive trouble of learning his name, with the blog having been convinced the boldy boss would be sacked in September.
A rather poorly attended Perico poll in Mundo Deportivo suggests that 56 percent of those bothering to vote - which includes the blog - thinks that Tintin should be shown the door.
But this should be taken with a pinch of salt, considering 4 percent of one poll tips Spurs to win the Premier League while another asks the Culé collective what they most love about Pep’s Dream Boys.
From the eight options offered up, it’s ‘the motivation’ that is currently winning out.
La Liga Loca’s completely made up and not to be taken seriously with real money Sack Race
6-1 Bartolomé Márquez (Espanyol)
7-1 Bernd Schuster (Real Madrid)
11-1 Bernd Schuster’s replacement (Real Madrid)
14-1 Javier Aguirre (Atlético)
15-1 Victor Muñoz (Getafe)
16-1 Unai Emery (Valencia)
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