Premier League Fixtures 16-18 August 2014

16 Aug 12:45 Man Utd v Swansea
16 Aug 15:00 Leicester v Everton
16 Aug 15:00 QPR v Hull
16 Aug 15:00 Stoke v Aston Villa
16 Aug 15:00 West Brom v Sunderland
16 Aug 15:00 West Ham v Spurs
16 Aug 17:30 Arsenal v Crystal Palace
17 Aug 13:30 Liverpool v Southampton
17 Aug 16:00 Newcastle v Man City
18 Aug 20:00 Burnley v Chelsea

Bit boring isn't it considering it's the start of the season.

How about a massive welcome to van Gaal, and a farewell to manu's most important asset Howard Webb.

The return of Cesc Fabregas, a wonderful player treated like shit at barcelona and spain, if only he was English .

Welcome to the new players, Diego Costa, Sanchez and a load of others we don't really about. Goodbye to Suarez, thanks for the entertainment and enjoy diving as much as you want in a league that really appreciates it.

All the good teams have strengthened, most of them with dirty foreigners, manu with a manager, and Liverpool by buying Southampton. Even Everton spent money, the tight gits.

On top of everything there will be vanishing spray (which can also be used as mace if Joey Barton gets out of hand).

Come on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Smashes hand through dressing room wall

The fixtures are quite uninspiring and I can't really see any shocks bar maybe Spurs struggling at West Ham if you class that as a shock.

United will win comfortably but then they won the first game under Moyes comfortably as well. The United jizz fest should be in full swing by September with their fixtures but the Van Gaal implosion will happen at some point.

It's essential that we win and win by a few as I don't like the look of our second fixture away at City and then away at Spurs third game. Not that I'm scared of Spurs.

At least Stoke vs Villa is out the way early, no one should be subjected to that.

pieces of WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

the fixtures might be dull on paper if you're stuck in last season's mindset.

Most of those games involve a new manager or an overhauled squad or a potential banana skin or Arsenal. What's boring and uninspiring about that? Aside from Arsenal?

Bank Holiday weekend (that's 23 - 25th August to non UK residents) offers Everton v Arsenal and City v Liverpool.

First match of the season and we already have an injury crisis, with Koscielny picking up an Achilles problem on Saturday. Mertesacker only came back today so we'll probably have to play Chambers and Monreal as CBs.

TheCrazy58 wrote:Bank Holiday weekend (that's 23 - 25th August to non UK residents) offers Everton v Arsenal and City v Liverpool.

First match  of the season and we already have an injury crisis, with Koscielny picking up an Achilles problem on Saturday. Mertesacker only came back today so we'll probably have to play Chambers and Monreal as CBs.

Expect Arsenal to concede if Bony is playing. Monreal at CB is not good.

TheCrazy58 wrote:Bank Holiday weekend (that's 23 - 25th August to non UK residents) offers Everton v Arsenal and City v Liverpool.

First match of the season and we already have an injury crisis, with Koscielny picking up an Achilles problem on Saturday. Mertesacker only came back today so we'll probably have to play Chambers and Monreal as CBs.

surely in that case you just go with a rusty Mertesacker.

your squad looks very light in defence now Vermaelen gone. seems Chambers & Monreal the only cover for all 4 positions as it stands - I assume you gonna sign a couple more?

Unlike the distinctly unimpressed scousers, who after clean sweeping all honours last season have every right to feel somewhat of an anti climax with this one, bloody looking forward to the opening day.

Given this was actually a real thing:

Isco Benny wrote:Unlike the distinctly unimpressed scousers, who after clean sweeping all honours last season have every right to feel somewhat of an anti climax with this one, bloody looking forward to the opening day.

You kidding ?

The chance to see Coutinho, Sterling and Sturridge tear more teams to shreds at Anfield

Backed up by this giant german we have signed in midfield, an ever improving Henderson, Lovren screaming some life into the defence and Markovic and Lallana still to return from injury to make an impact.

This start of this season should be wonderful for us (until sturridge gets injured)  

Fey, did you lock Otto's wonderful Kaymer > McIlroy thread you motherf$$ker

It is due a timely bump

http://www.europeanboard.net/t14348-mcilroyvillegaskaymer?highlight=Kaymer

I personally will be glued to the tv next weekend, watching the following games:
16 Aug 12:45 Man Utd v Swansea (van Gaal)
16 Aug 15:00 West Ham v Spurs (Fat Sam vs Pochetinno)
16 Aug 17:30 Arsenal v Crystal Palace (Sanchez and Ramsey)
17 Aug 13:30 Liverpool v Southampton (Sterling and Coutinho)
17 Aug 16:00 Newcastle v Man City (Kimbo ranting about Pardew)
18 Aug 20:00 Burnley v Chelsea ( Mourinho parking the bus )

Isco Benny wrote:Unlike the distinctly unimpressed scousers, who after clean sweeping all honours last season have every right to feel somewhat of an anti climax with this one, bloody looking forward to the opening day.

Given this was actually a real thing:

Let's hope four in a row on Saturday!   

Koscielny fit for Saturday  

Apparently Pulis is in 'crisis talks' with Palace suits over the club's transfer policy.

Update: BBC says Pulis has resigned.

Palace to be relegated then

yeah that's gonna royally fuck Palace up. how the hell do they get themselves into that situation after having such a good season? you'd think they'd have been falling over selves to make Pulis happy after the way he turned them round.

Chairman is probably a mong

most likely.

Pulis is gonna be the go-to guy for whichever club makes a bad start and sacks their manager in October. I predict WBA.

Ooh.. Could be you guys!

christmasborocooper wrote:Ooh.. Could be you guys!

I think we already got the immediate replacement lined-up if/when Lambert goes - our new assistant manager.

Pulis will be at QPR by Christmas. YHIHF

Moyes apparently favourite to succeed Pulis.

Di Caniooooo! wrote:
Let's hope four in a row on Saturday!   

Tell Lord Samuel that To dare is to do.

4 thousand Yiddos marching East to find out if he really does shit gold.

TheCrazy58 wrote:Moyes apparently favourite to succeed Pulis.

If I were Moyes I'd wait and see what happens at West Ham,
taken charge of them as they move to the Olympic Stadium might take them somewhere.
Crystal Palace is a dead end job

rosenthal wrote:

TheCrazy58 wrote:Moyes apparently favourite to succeed Pulis.

If I were Moyes I'd wait and see what happens at West Ham,
taken charge of them as they move to the Olympic Stadium might take them somewhere.
Crystal Palace is a dead end job

How it takes them longer to convert the stadium than to build it, I have no idea. So much can happen before 2016.

Ross Barkley out for 6 weeks apparently. Blow for Everton as Lukaku is struggling to be fit as well.

Wonder if we play Ravel Morrison, let him stretch his legs before he's jailed. Though, knowing the UK's justice he'll probably just get community service.

Di Caniooooo! wrote:Wonder if we play Ravel Morrison, let him stretch his legs before he's jailed. Though, knowing the UK's justice he'll probably just get community service.

He'd probably be already dead in America.

LVP has his work cut out with that collection of shite

Man United: De Gea; Jones, Smalling, Blackett; Lingard, Fletcher, Herrera, Young; Mata; Rooney, Hernandez

Swansea: Fabianski, Rangel, Amat, Williams, Taylor, Ki, Shelvey, Dyer, Sigurdsson, Routledge, Bony

That's probably the shittest defence I've ever seen United field.

They'll win today though - Swansea side looks decent but they won't have the bottle at OT.